HERSELF v OURSELVES -RHODES CRITICAL COURT

Withdrawn, quiet, obedient, shy and very observant. This is how everyone sees her but how does she see herself. She shuffles her feet hesitantly to let me into her room. A smile creeps onto her face as she notices the reassuring one on mine. The room she owns is so much more colourful than I expected it to be, a sharp contrast to her seemingly colourless life. Something stirs the need to know what else the interview will reveal underneath her layered self.
Nyasha speaks slowly cautiously, as one would if they were forced to step onto quicksand. She stiffens; wringing her hands on her laps and braces herself for the oncoming questions. She has been through the most challenging year in her life so far. She came to Rhodes expecting an easy flowing life but it turned to be quite the opposite; a hurdle track.
When she arrived she had no friends at all and felt homesick most of the time. Her facial expression confirmed that telling the story was just like reliving it. As if homesickness was not enough, she felt too shy to approach anyone about her problem adapting to Rhodes. She did not know her way around campus and always found it difficult to have to ask for directions to go somewhere. She explains how meeting new people has always been one of her biggest fears. She touches my cords of emotion when she says, “there is nothing as fearful as having to face your fears.” A true revelation of how she felt when she came to University.
Her biggest fear however was that she would not fit in. At first every first year was in the same boat; scared and observant. When everyone else had moved on to a faster university life, Nyasha was still the same. This sparked a lot of criticism from everyone around her. She shakes her head and almost whispers, “I felt so much like the ugly duckling of the university.” For some time this affected her academic work. She could not concentrate in lectures because she kept thinking that everyone who looked her way was talking about her.
She relates one particular incident that she encountered. On her second Saturday at Rhodes, she was getting ready for bed when she heard a sharp commanding knock on her door. She opened the door to find a group of first years she barely knew dressed in skimpy, glittery attire. She knew immediately that they were on a mission to show the nerd what real university life was about. Her lips trembled, reluctant to smile.
The tall gal who dominated the gang simply said, “Get dressed.” Nyasha just stood in awe with her mouth agape. She slammed the door shut in their faces and slumped against the door. She could not stand to think that everyone thought she needed someone to help her discover herself. She throws her head back and laughs. A real laugh.
Thinking back now she has every reason to laugh at how stupid she was, to think she had to fit in when all she had to do was be herself. She is not at all what people perceived her to be but one thing was certain. She is unique.

FAST FACTS

Favourite Movie: Bourne Ultimatum.

Favourite Colour: Blue.

Role model:Oprah Winfrey.

Most embarassing moment: i stepped on a wet spot and fell in the dining hall as i was going to place my tray on the trolley. What made it worse was that the leftover custard in the tray spilled all ober my face.It was like a movie scene.